Women – the second “W” in widowhood

September 4, 2018


The second “W” of widowhood brought a delightful surprise, a large group of girlfriends, well, women. I’ve always been more comfortable around men, having an older brother I adored. Hanging around his friends taught me that men are direct—no hidden agendas for them. I like that because you usually know where you stand with a guy. A tomboy as a young girl, I climbed trees, played in the woods, and enjoyed sports competition with boys. My problem with most other girls involved dolls and prissy things. There’s nothing wrong with those things, but for me, yuk.

Sam became my best friend when we dated (I was fifteen) and remained so throughout our marriage. I stayed close with only a few women who are still friends to this day. And through church I met one sweet friend who I call my Bestie.

But Christian life grows us in ways we never envision.

Through my bass guitarist husband, Sam, I met many musicians and singers from the worship team where we attended church. One group of these women meets every Thursday for “Breakfast Club,” and they invited me to join. I stutter-started a few times, but I’m usually there each week. The group expands and contracts as people travel or move, but most often there are six of us. It’s not just chat and chew, it’s catch-up and renew. There is joy in the friendships, encouragement, accountability, and much prayer.

Besides my few close friends, these women have come alongside me as I endure the loneliness of widowhood. Many times I want to stay in bed and pull the covers over my face. Then the text pings begin as I fight the urge to self-absorb.

Get out of bed, Lisa. Go hang with these dear ones. God brought them into your life. Get up!

I thank God for them, all of them, and I never leave our times together with anything less than hope. I often depart with tears from laughing. The picture for this post was taken a few years ago as we laughed and visited. These women. Oh, what joy.

My prayer for you if you face the loneliness of widowhood is to find a group of women strong in the Lord and mighty in loyalty. I see Jesus at work in each of us, and He only does wondrous things.

I’m here. Please let me know how I may pray for you.

Much love from me and Lewis (my first male cat),


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